Still Overwhelmed....

Another day...another entry...I am thinking today of all the things I left out yesterday...the ladies of our church that are privileged to stay home during the day have been joining me on Monday mornings for a Bible Study...OH how I have missed Bible Study...I have needed this...I thought if I was lucky one or two ladies would join me but we have consistently had 7-9 ladies and it has been just a sweet time...refreshing...just what my soul was longing for...so thankful for each one of them...

I am thankful for the man that I have shared 33 1/2 years (not all that time married!) of my life with...he never ceases to amaze me...probably there is no one who can make me as angry as him...or hurt my feelings like him...and then turn around and make me feel like the most treasured person on earth...truth be told that is what I feel 99% of the time...our marriage has been and continues to be a work in progress...just as all marriage are or at least should be...he is a kind man...who loves very deeply...when you have been loved by Scott...you know you are loved...as his kids and grand kids will tell you...I think even his mom and siblings would say that...he still hugs his brothers and sisters and tells them he loves them...most of the time...there was a time...I hate to admit this...but I was jealous of Jesus because I've known for a very long time now that I come 2nd in Scott's life...but do you know what I've learned over the years??? (young ladies take advice from this...love a man who loves Jesus way more than you)...as he has fallen more and more in love with the Savior...he is able to love me more and more...the last 32 years of marriage have been amazing and I look forward to the next however many years God blesses us with...

I spoke of Michael and Beks yesterday but I haven't forgotten my girls...and their sweet families...my grand babies are, in my opinion, some of the very best!!!! Adyen Parker will be 9 years old very soon and he still comes in and gives his grammy a hug...I was wondering the other day...if and when that will stop...I hope never...I hope he always likes to come to Grammy and Poppy's...give me a hug and just hang with us...I know to a degree he will out grow us but I also know we could be a safe place for him...that is what I want for him and all of them....now mind you all the boys will give me hugs...and I love them all!!! He is just the oldest so I fear his hugs may stop sooner!!!!! NOOOOO!!!! He is very sensitive just as our Caleb is...they both have deep questions about Jesus...as they grow and attempt to make sense out of this crazy thing we call life...they all (6 of them) love to giggle...and even snuggle...some easier than other but they will all take a time of snuggles with the Grams! I have loved watching Landon bloom in his new school this year...he has a lot more smiles this year than last...I know when the Ball family moved to Florida it was so very hard on Ayden...because he left everything he knew...and the move back was just as hard on Landon b/c he moved back here and left everything he knew there!!!! He is becoming quite the little man this year...and Cams...our kindergarten Rooster...reading already...funny...I'm sure he will be voted class clown more than once in his lifetime!!!! Rylee and Caleb also are loving kindergarten...the ladies are chasing him and she is proud that at this point she hasn't clipped down ONE TIME!!!! She reminds me of her momma the way she will be so quiet in the background...just patiently waiting for you to say hi or hug her...then she bounces along her merry way!!!! Never feeling ignored...she is just quiet...and then there will be that every ONCE IN  A WHILE when she will talk your leg off...sweet girl...oh and our Laney Kate...mess baby girl!!! She is our miss priss and all that comes with it...she knows how to carry a purse and smack you with it all at the same time...Grammy has enjoyed her this year...

and my girls...my friends...I love them so much...I'm so proud of the paths they are all walking on...I'm so very thankful I can call them my friends...and I'm thankful I can say my sweet daughter in law is one too! They are all amazing women of the Lord...a dream come truein all of them...2 of them are amazing mommies...something they did not learn from me...again thankful for grace...they understand their rolls (all 4 of them) so much better than I did at that age...and they all 4 grasp the fact that each step they place their foot on is a mission field...I look forward in the years to come to see 2 more of them become mamma's and and I have no doubt they will be amazing as well...

And for my Son in laws...so very thankful that they will come hang out with us...I think we, overall, enjoy each other! We are not a perfect family...and at times we have a small bit of tension...but each one of us would be there for the other one...if and when needed...God I am overwhelmed by these people I get to call mine...thank YOU...thank you to the parents of the ones who have joined us by choice...thank YOU for trusting ME to be their mom...their Grammy...for 2nd chances...God you are GOOD!!!

...a jumbled mess of thankfulness...

How do I begin to say how thankful I am...November will soon be upon us and those of us who are faithful (or addicted addicts) to Facebook will be putting a daily...I am thankful for... on our status...but I have found myself thinking the last few days of all I'm thankful for already...and let me tell you...it is all running through my head like a jumbled up mess!!!!

Yesterday in church I was worshiping as Michael and Bekah led us...and I found myself thankful...for the one my son has found...the love they share is very apparent between the two of them...they had pulled a little prank on someone yesterday and it was just about all they could both do to keep from bursting out in laughter at any given moment...but then true worship started...I love to see my children worship...don't you...is there anything sweeter...maybe a grandbaby raising hands to the Lord...back to Michael and Beks...she follows his lead so well...in a marriage isn't that how it is suppose to be? I was a bit overwhelmed by it...

Then my step dad...Tucker was taking up the offering and I just glanced his way...and again...I was overwhelmed by the thought of just how lucky I have been to have this special person in my life over the last 34 plus years...I even found myself envious of his children...what an honor to be able to call him dad...and watch the Lord do a transforming miracle in  their daddy's life over the years...I too, am thankful to have witnessed it...he is a good man...not a perfect man...but still a good man...and a man who has taken such good care of my mom! He has a place in my heart that no one else can have...it is his place...he earned...or maybe a better word is he...won it...and I am thankful for him...I have stood by the grave to two other men in my life that have help to form me into the woman I have become...one I told and the other I just assumed he knew...I am overwhelmed with the fact that I do NOT want to take people for granted again...

We have two new "daughters" this year...and I have come to love them both very deeply already...they are very different girls...much like my own children are all very different...but they each have a place in my heart that will forever be there...I am thankful for our Sasha and the way she is opening up to us more and more...I desire nothing more than for her to have true joy...and peace in her sweet life...I love to see her face light up with a smile...and for our Sofia...she has embraced us with open arms...and as she transitions into our lives I want nothing more for her either...joy...peace...HOPE...I am overwhelmed that God choose Scott and I once again be apart of two young ladies lives...Lord...give us wisdom...love...

We spent a little time appreciating our pastor and his sweet family yesterday...again thankful...thankful they are still standing...they are a picture to the world what Jesus can and will do...if only we will seek Him above our feelings...wants...pain...HE IS EVERYTHING...and HE IS ENOUGH...I am thankful that they are willing to let us know that and see that first hand...although...truth be told...we are all the same...if we as believers are standing it is by the grace of God...and the transforming power of Jesus Christ!!!!

...I have more to be thankful for and it will be coming soon...but I want to end with this one more thing I am overwhelmed with...

my heritage...as far as with the Lord...has not got a great track record...my mom and step dad are changing that but as for my grandparents I just know I never saw or heard about Jesus...all I know is I never really heard about the Lord as a child except when His name was being miss used...I want so much for my children...grandchildren...and all the extras that join us along the way to know a heritage of Jesus from our home...to know we love Him...serve Him and desire to love Him above all else...to laugh...and to cry...and to know there is hope in HIM...

I was driving to see my mom the other day...and I past my grandparents old farm...they have both been gone for quite some time now and their farm has been sold a few times since...but now...a church has purchased the land and will be building on it in the future...as I past the other day I notice this on the property...

the sun was just coming onto the cross...with the fog still there...to see a church...and the hope of the cross on my grandparents property brings great joy to me...and I believe, it brings great joy to them as well...I believe no matter their choice in life...that would want us...their legacy...their family...their ancestors to know that the hope of this world...and eternity is found only in the cross...I know this may sound so silly but the emotions that I had that morning was...overwhelming...

As we begin to embrace the holiday season...may be be overwhelmed in HIM...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F6oxXwRWFTo 

Sweet Katie

Well my baby turned 24 today...I cannot believe how time flies! She has reached her goal of becoming a teach at McDonald County High School. I can't tell you how excited and proud that makes me...while none of my children are perfect...they all have a heart for the Lord...I think all the kids would agree that Katie was not afraid to be bold at times during her 4 years in high school...and now she goes back as an adult...and teacher that will have a hand in helping to influence our next generation of leaders...I trust God will once again use her in the halls of our high school...I believe she will do her very best to see each student through the blood stain eyes of our Savior... She is such a sweet person...beautiful inside and out...I am so thankful that God allowed...trusted me to be her momma...and that she chooses me to be a friend...Katie...have a fantastically amazing birthday weekend...I love you momma

Heros

I have a few people in my life that I would call my heros. For one reason or another they have impacted my life or I admire a strength I see in them! One would be my son...I have watched him overcome a few obstacles in his life that have truly been a battle for him...you might not think so or the world may not think so but Michael and I both know he has overcome...through Christ...in this moms eyes he IS one of my hero's...and to see him be the husband I always knew was in there...WOWO...he had...in my opinion...the greatest teacher/example living with him as he grew to be the man he is today...with that said...Scott and I would both say...all credit goes to The Lord and the grace He has lavished on our family over the years. My girls are each one a hero to me in different ways...while each one is different...I have no doubt that each one of them would rise to the occasion each faces on a daily basis in their lives...Cassie for her willingness to trust Jesus enough to follow Him to scary places (I am not just talking about moving!)...to Heather and Bekah who have both allowed us to see an upclose picture of what it means in the scripture when it says He will make beauty from ashes...Oh if we were all willing and trusting enough to allow The Lord the make beauty from our ashes...and my Katie...who at such a young age has taught me what a consuming fire for The Lord looks like...she had a passionate heart for her high school all 4 years...for people to know Christ...and now she returns as an adult/teacher with the same passion...may that passion be caught... My last hero...who teaches me everyday...Scott...I was thinking the other day for words that would discribe him...goofy...silly...funny....loving...true meaning of daddy/poppy...provider...friend...but the number one word that overall discribes him...joyful...Christ follower. Obviously my life is full of Christ followers and I do not mean to take from them or their walk/witness but I do not live with them...I live with Scott Griffith...I am the one person who can tell you if he lives it or not...he is just who he is...everywhere...everyday...you may like him...you may not but he is real...authentic... I have had a few young people cross my path as well that I am amazed at them and what they have overcome as well...however, with all this said..I am learning that I am blessed to have each of these precious people in my life...to be able to witness each of them overcome challenges through Christ...but...my eyes and my trust cannot be in them...they are human...they will let me down...just has I have let them down more times than I care to count...Christ must be my focus...my true understanding of hero...the One who willingly laid His life down...who willingly obeyed the Father even when it was hard and scary and lonely...the One who loves me more than anyone else even has the ability to!

I pray He will always speak...open my ears to hear and my eyes to see...

This morning as I was driving to church, I had a few people on my heart and I thought I should be praying for them...and I realized immediately that I had NOT been praying for them like I should have...and for some that came to mind, I hadn't prayed at all!!! The Lord very clearly spoke to my heart this morning...Lori...truly...who DO you pray for faithfully other than your own immediate family or yourself?...This MUST change! It is a choice...truth is, do I even care???? Do I believe He is the power-to help-to heal-to save-to overcome the things in our lives we struggle with and do I believe He gives answers to questions we seek? While I believe that as a wife, mother and Grammy I should be their #1 prayer warrior, I must start seeing outside my own little "world"...and as I was writing the notes for this post in church...all theses names came to my mind...families...individuals...loved ones...even people I hardly know...I could close my eyes and see each sweet face...some just need encouragement, others need healing...others need financial burdens met...while others need a relationship with Jesus Christ...the names went on and on...Lord open my eyes...break my heart...restore to me the joy of YOUR salvation...

Beauty from Ashes

Today is another anniversary...Harold...I would say has been gone...but truth is Harold has been HOME for 1 year today...I stopped by the cemetery last night because I had not seen his tombstone yet...I wasn't even thinking about today being August 7th...I cried a few more tears...because selfishly I miss him...oh but the thought of him and our sweet poppa in glory!!! I can't even find the words to describe what that must be like for either of those great men! The moment both of those great men left our presence to be in the presence of their Savior I have thought of them, missed them, cried over them...rejoiced for them...but over this last year I've found myself wondering what is it like...I know there are no more tears for them because Jesus promised to wipe them all away! Do you ever wonder what they see on a daily (does daily exist in eternity?) basis? The colors, the majesty...the glory...do they have a job or do they worship none stop at the throne...I trust and believe that they love us but wouldn't trade where they are for one more minute with us...and they long for us to join them...I know the angels in heaven rejoiced...heck they partied because of Adyson's decision to follow Christ a few weeks ago...but what was the look on poppa's face...oh the wonder of it all! I want to say we have survived this last year because of the men who have gone one before us because they did have a great impact on that...knowing they would want us to go on...to be OK...but may we never EVER forget the grace that abounds on a daily basis for our great God...as my Caleb and Rylee would say...the ONE TRUE GOD!!!...He has been the ONE who sustained us this year...given us the power to make it through the hard days...the "1st's" that we all have to walk through. God to me...the ONE who saved me who healed (healing) me who saved our family from utter destruction who gifted me with this man I walk beside each day who gave me and trusted me with Cassie Diane Heather Michelle Michael Scott and Katie Elizabeth who blessed me with Ayden, Landon, Rylee, Caleb, Camden, Laney Kate and now with **** and ***** who will bless me with more to come from others!!! who allows me to stand before students weekly and pour into them who allows me to stand before women once in a while and share who took me from what I was and is in the process of making me into who He desires who has taught me about forgiveness and trust who has allowed me to finally have true friendships in my life who blessed our lives with Amy and Gastao and now we will have the honor of Sofia and Sasha who amazes me with His creation...the beauty and the wonder of it all... who made this last year bearable... My list could go on and on... One thing I don't do well...is play like everything is OK when it is not...play the whole "church" game...and that carries over into worship for me as well...I truly want to mean the songs that I am singing...we were worshipping the last Sunday morning and singing the words to "Draw me Close"...as I was singing the chorus...it hit me...do I mean this...(quick answer is yes)...but truth...do I live this...just think about these words... Your all I want, Your all I ever needed Your all I want, help me know You are near it is REALLY true...is He all I want...until...the cravings start...cravings for ANYTHING OR ANYONE our flesh desires...whether that is a struggle with food, drugs, sex, alcohol...porn, social media, TV, video games, advancement in our career (even the career advancement in the ministry), our education, our children having everything they want...that special someone...our own sinful fleshly desires... True scripture today for me...Mark 9:24...Immediately the boy’s father exclaimed, “I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!” that is ME!!!! I say I believe out of one side of my mouth while the other side is saying...help my unbelief... truth is God loves us (thank YOU!!!!) and until we take our last breath we are a work in progress...we will work out our salvation with fear and trembling... I don't know about you but that all gives me hope...to see that I am not who I want to be BUT I am not who I once was either...to know that I am a work in progress and that I will be until my last breath...to know that God is real...I KNOW He is real because I KNOW what He has done in my life...I don't have to debate evolution or another argument because HE HAS DONE GREAT THINGS IN MY LIFE and that is enough proof for me! I want to close with the words of this song... We're singing you are holy great and mighty The moon and the stars declare who You are I’m so unworthy but still You love me Forever my heart will sing of how great You are

The difference a year makes!

Today is Michael's 28th birthday...this last year has been the largest of his life I would say! He has a year of marriage under his belt...he has 2 kids that he will pour Jesus into for as long as he can...he has grown as a man so much! I love to watch the way he loves Bekah...he loves her well...he makes her beautiful gifts...he protects her...he comforts her...he lights up still when she walks into the room... I want you to know Michael that I am so proud of the man you are...I'm thankful that you have found the grace to forgive a messed up mom and allowed me the honor of witnessing your journey through this life...I'm beyond happy that God brought Bekah into your life and our lives...I cannot wait to see what this next year holds for you! Always remember to serve the Lord above all else...then the rest is blessed from the overflow of that...I love you! Happy birthday!!!!