year 51

You are mine best friend! This has so far been one of the saddest years of our lives together...I find myself almost dreaded the rest of the year...but you are spurred on by the grace of the Lord.

As we opened your time capsule last night I amazed at how far we have come! How much we love one another...you know it really isn't you or me either...we finally have a picture of a Christ centered marriage and that makes love so much easier...(remind me of that when I get aggravated at you next time!).

I don't even have words to say this year...I'm so thankful we still have each other...I want to be like your mom and dad...curled up beside one another to the very end...to be like Kathy and get to a place in our lives where we can say we have no regrets...to be like Steve and Patti and go to what ever lengths it takes to tell others about Jesus...to be like you and have the passion to share Jesus in a house full of partiers knowing when I walk out they may make fun of me...to be like serve with reckless abandonment...to know if I go first none of this will change for you...and if you go first none of this will change for me!

thank you for raising our kids in a manner worthy of the gospel....thank you for being such an impact on my family....thank you for loving me on the hardest days...thank you for cheering me on! thank your serving beside me...thank you mostly for loving Jesus more than anything or anyone else...

we are blessed to call you ours...wouldn't you agree...Cassie, Heather, Michael and Katie?

I love you,
Beth

Michael

This year has been a whirlwind of change and newness and the beginning of living the rest of your life! I have the honor of stepping back as the woman in his life and the one the Lord has for him to share life with has stepped in! (I always thought that would be hard, but when the right one comes it is the natural thing and easiest thing to do!) She is an amazing young lady who loves Jesus more than she loves Michael and that will be the key to their success in life together.

You walk different, you look different, you act different...everything about you is different this year. I've never got to witness this side of love with one of my kids...it is different with the girls because they fulfill the wife side of the equation...one that is also my role so I see the submission side...the caregiver side...but now I've seen the side the man goes through...of preparing to lead a home, a wife and in the future a family. It is evident God is doing a great thing in your life and in your new beginning with Beks!

I say it every year but I'm so proud and honored to be your momma! I love you because you are mine...but I love you because you:
 
Are tenderhearted to a fault
You laugh so hard with your nephews and nieces
I see more and more of your dad in you all the time
You aggravate your sisters still like crazy but I know your would be their greatest defender still!
You are getting ready for babies of your own and it is evident!
You act "tough" at church with the kids but they all LOVE you so you must do something right!
You love your momma and I know it!
You love Beks and we all see it (yes in your eyes)...every time she walks in the room!

Praying a extra special birthday blessing over you today! I love you Michael Scott!

mom

 

and woman and her God...

We are still having those "days" as we adjust to Willie being in heaven and not here with us. Today we said yet another goodbye to a sweet soul. Again, I watched in amazement as our community poured out love on a family mourning the loss of their wife, momma, nana, daughter, sister and best friend...

She was obviously loved by so many and her family is too! She shared something with Willie...and I heard it today again...she was a GOOD person...kind and generous, compassionate and motherly...GOOD to the very core of her being...but that is NOT what has given her family the comfort they have...she knew Jesus...in a very real and very personal way...and that my sweet friends is the hope she had and that her family will cling to in the coming days!

I would share her name but it doesn't matter...most of you reading this know who I'm speaking of and if not the Lord knows her by name...I watched in amazement as her brother shared the gospel today and I'm praying that lives who are lost were changed today...not because of her...but because of her LORD!

One of the most courageous (thank you Josh for that word!) things I've ever witnessed was her son singing today flawlessly...I've been amazed at that all day long...and while I was working this afternoon it hit me how he did it...Scott asked him today at the cemetery how he did it and he said I just tried not to think to much...but I think he was able to do it b/c he was worshiping the Lord! Have you ever experienced that...watching in awe as someone is obviously worshiping in spirit and in truth? That is what we witnessed today...a holy moment...from a son...honoring his momma...and FOR HIS LORD...

Someday when my times comes...I want people to walk away from my celebration service knowing they meet with the Lord...

May those of us left...carry on the work...

Happy Father's Day

Before I start this post...they will not all be in order...that being said...to the men in my life...

The first man in my life is my Dad...he worked hard to make a living for us...we have had our share of pain and heart ache but we have come so far! I think we have finally reached a place where we know we need each other and we are learning to know one another better! Dad, thanks for all you've done for me over the years...just so you know...I wouldn't change a thing! I love you Dad!

For Tucker...the next man in my life who has loved me like his own...kept me out of trouble with mom in the early years and loved my kids! You've allowed us all the honor of watching you transform into the man of God you are now...Thank you for loving us when I know we weren't always easy to love! I love you Pawpaw!

For Harold who has also loved me like his own...you too have set an example of a loving Godly man...life wouldn't be the same without you in it...I'm thankful for you more than I say and I want you to know how much you mean to me...I love you Harold!

For Michael...while he is yet to be a dad...he has been my little man in my life and as he has grown he has stepped up to his dads boots and takes care of this momma when she needs an extra shoulder to lean on...can't wait to see what kind of a dad he will be...amazing I'm sure!

For Willie...ugh...we miss you more than words can say...I look in Scotts eyes and see a reflection of who you were as a young man...as you taught your sons what it meant to work hard...love you family and love the Lord...I think tonight I may be most thankful for you because you and Linda raised the man I have now...you planted seeds that God has grown...and the world is a better place because of this man I call mine...that you raised! Tomorrow will be sad without you...looking at cards today was yucky because you should be getting one...but know this...we will be rejoicing as we worship the Lord in the morning...knowing that you have the honor and the privilege of being in the presence of the One True Father...what a Father's Day for YOU...we love you Pops!

and finally for my sweet loving husband...thank you for loving me when no one else would have...for walking beside my healing process...for holding my hand...for opening my car door...for not just being the father of our kids...but for being their daddy...for being my best friend...for loving me at my fattest...and encouraging me on this journey without belittling me...for loving Jesus like no one I've ever witnessed before...for allowing me the honor of watching this transformation the Lord continues to do in your life...for sharing Jesus even in the dark days of losing your own dad...for praying when the words were almost more than you could grown...for being you...I love you!

God gives good things...

What a week of emotions! We are not done yet...but we have come up for air for just a little bit! When we lose people we love we are reminded again of 2 things I think...how short life is...and how much we take one another for granted if we don't be careful!

This week we lost my father in law...a man who has spent his life...serving the Lord and serving others...first and foremost his family...but in the middle of our grief God gave a special day of celebration as another family starts their new and fresh. Michael finally got his girl!

I've been looking thru their wedding pictures this morning and came across this one and I am still amazing that God trusted me to be their momma!

They all are a blessing to my life...as a group...but then, as individuals, who have a place that only that ONE can fill...I think at times each one of them has felt maybe they didn't fit...some because of birth order, some because of distance...some because they didn't add up to what they thought they were suppose to be...and yet as I stare at this picture and think...how would I be able to take a breath in the morning if one of them was not there...you each have your dynamic you bring to what makes us...us! Cassie brings the hand on the shoulder that attempts to steady us all...not that she can because that only comes from the Lord...but she tries...I remember last year when she was still in FL and Heather lost her father in law...the hardest thing for Cassie was that she couldn't be her to touch Heather...to help her feel steady...but I know her hands couldn't touch her sister then...but I KNOW her knees hit the floor for her sister and she took the needs to the ONE who steadies us all! Heather brings the (first) strong will to our family...and though she didn't show it daily...she did have that...and now I see what a blessing that is! You see when you are strong willed...no one can change your mind...as you grow into adulthood...when you begin to grasp what you believe...and what is truly important in life...that strong will is your life line...she has taught me that...I think she has even shown me how to have my own strong will...she is the anchor when trials come...Michael brings laughter...which is good...but you have to remember when he was little his momma didn't know how to laugh...he has taught us all to laugh...and at times still drives us bananas...but we always know it's because he loves to laugh...and he thinks...come one people...it's funny...(girls can't you just hear him...) "that's funny!"...and now we get to see him with laughter as his wife begins life with him...and Katie...Heather said it best years ago when she said...Katie is her 6th grade hero...Katie brings faith from the cradle to us...mind you we all have our faith now...but none (I think they would all agree) of us have had the faith she has had from almost her first breath...the greatest blessing of all of this is...God made them the way they are...each one of pushed at times against HIS hands but each has yielded their lives to Him and are allowing Him to form them in to the men and the women they continue to become...they have each taken a life partner that is allowing the Lord to work in their lives as well...making families that are strong and faithful...and that my friends is what life is all about...

and IF you don't believe me...join us tomorrow for Poppas goodbye...because I have no doubt in my mind that you will walk away from that church tomorrow knowing a man who left a legacy behind...a man who yielded to the Lord...loved his family and is with his Jesus right now...I know that each one of our family was emotional yesterday at church because we were overwhelmed with the thought that Willie was worshiping Jesus face to face on his first Sabbath in heaven...

Michael

The day has finally arrived! I'm so happy for you...I've watched you for many years...with your skills as a craftsman and your ability to make a yard look so amazing and thought in that aspect you would make such a great husband...but it goes beyond that...I see a man who has learned to love his Lord with a gentle and quiet spirit and yet with great passion...because I live with a man like that...I know there is nothing greater than to have a husband like that!

I have so many things I wish I could do over...you know that...I've said it more than I really should have...but I'm so thankful for your forgiveness...and two times in particular you gently have shown me you truly have forgiven...when you sang my song you wrote me...and when you came and got me last year during the youth led service and prayed with me...God allowed me to experience those 2 times with you and they are forever etched in my mind! I know we have both had our struggles with issues in our lives...and I also know that all sin is level at the foot of the cross...but as humans we think one is worse than another...you and I understand forgiveness in it's most grace filled form!

I can't wait to see the look on your face when those doors open today and your bride walks into your arms...I'm so proud of you...and as much as I wish we could both change some choices...I truly wouldn't change anything because God used that to make Himself real to us...and to lavish us with grace and to teach us what redemption looks like...

Happy, happy wedding day...I love you and wish a lifetime of happiness with the Beks!

love,
mom